Why Most Business Writing Training Completely Misses the Point (And What Actually Works)

Nobody tells you that 87% of business writing courses are taught by people who've never written anything that matters in the real world.

I've been running workplace training programs across Australia for the past 18 years, and I can tell you with absolute certainty that most business writing training is complete bollocks. There, I said it. After watching countless employees emerge from these courses still unable to write a decent email, let alone a proposal that doesn't put the reader to sleep, someone needs to call it out.

The problem isn't that people can't write. The problem is that we're teaching them to write like robots instead of humans.

The Great Business Writing Scam

Let me paint you a picture. Sarah from accounting attends a three-day business writing course in Melbourne. She learns about "professional tone," "appropriate salutations," and "formal structure." She comes back to the office and writes emails that sound like they were generated by a committee of lawyers having a particularly boring day.

Meanwhile, the CEO gets results by writing emails like: "Team - quick question. Can someone please tell me why our Q3 numbers look like a toddler's first attempt at finger painting? Need answers by Friday. Cheers, Mike."

Guess which one gets read first?

Here's what drives me absolutely mental about traditional business writing training: they teach you to remove your personality, when personality is exactly what makes writing effective. I've seen proposals win contracts not because they were grammatically perfect, but because they sounded like they came from actual human beings who gave a damn about the outcome.

What Actually Works: The Authenticity Factor

Back in 2019, I was working with a mining company in Perth whose tender responses were consistently unsuccessful. Their writing was technically flawless - perfect grammar, immaculate formatting, zero personality. Their competitors were winning contracts with proposals that had typos but told compelling stories about real projects and real results.

That's when I realised we've been teaching business writing completely backwards.

The most effective business communicators I know break half the rules they teach in business schools. They use contractions. They start sentences with "And" or "But." They ask rhetorical questions that would make their Year 10 English teacher weep.

And it works.

Because here's the thing nobody wants to admit: people don't make business decisions based purely on logic. They make decisions based on feeling confident about the people they're dealing with. And confident people don't hide behind corporate jargon.

The Three Things They Never Teach You

1. Write Like You're Explaining It to Your Mate at the Pub

The best business writing sounds conversational, not like it was assembled by a compliance department. When you're explaining something complex, imagine you're telling your friend about it over a beer. What words would you use? What examples would you give?

I once helped a client rewrite their safety training manual using this approach. Instead of "Personnel must ensure compliance with established protocols," we wrote "Here's how to not accidentally kill yourself or your workmates." Engagement rates went up 340%.

2. Start with the Problem, Not the Process

Traditional business writing courses teach you to start with background, provide context, then eventually get to the point somewhere around paragraph seventeen. Real business writing starts with the problem that's keeping your reader awake at night.

Don't write: "Following our comprehensive analysis of current market conditions and stakeholder feedback, we have identified several areas for improvement..."

Write: "You're losing $50K a month because your checkout process is broken. Here's how to fix it."

3. Use Specific Numbers Instead of Vague Claims

Instead of saying "significant improvement," say "23% faster processing time." Instead of "substantial cost savings," say "saved $127,000 in the first quarter." Specificity builds credibility in ways that corporate speak never will.

The Melbourne Revelation

I remember running a workshop in Melbourne for a tech startup whose founder kept complaining that their team's written communication was "unprofessional." After reviewing their internal emails, I realised the problem wasn't professionalism - it was that they were so focused on sounding corporate that they'd forgotten how to communicate clearly.

We spent two days teaching them to write like humans again. Sales emails became conversations. Project updates became stories. Suddenly, their clients started responding faster, and their internal meetings became 40% shorter because people actually understood what was being communicated.

This is where most effective communication training programs get it right - they focus on clarity over corporate theatre.

The Uncomfortable Truth About Professional Writing

Professional doesn't mean boring. Professional means effective. And effective writing connects with people on a human level, not just an intellectual one.

I've seen brilliant engineers struggle to get buy-in for important projects because their proposals read like technical manuals. I've watched talented managers get overlooked for promotions because their reports were so dry that senior leadership couldn't stay awake long enough to recognise their insights.

The irony? These same people could explain their ideas perfectly in person. But the moment they sat down to write, they transformed into corporate writing zombies, churning out sentences that would make a grammar textbook proud and a human being confused.

What Your Team Actually Needs

Forget about perfect grammar for a minute. Focus on these instead:

Clarity over complexity. If your grandmother couldn't understand your main point, rewrite it.

Stories over statistics. Numbers matter, but stories make numbers memorable. When you tell someone that customer satisfaction improved by 15%, they nod politely. When you tell them about the angry customer who became your biggest advocate after you fixed their problem, they remember.

Purpose over polish. Every piece of business writing should answer one question: "So what?" If you can't answer that in one sentence, you're not ready to write.

One of my favourite success stories involves a construction company in Brisbane whose project managers were spending hours writing status reports that nobody read. We taught them to lead with three bullet points: What's done, what's next, what's stuck. Their weekly reports went from four pages to half a page, and suddenly project stakeholders started actually reading them.

Speaking of which, if you're dealing with workplace anxiety around writing, you're not alone. Half the people I work with are brilliant at their jobs but freeze up when asked to put their thoughts on paper.

The Real Secret

Here's something that might surprise you: the best business writers aren't necessarily the best writers overall. They're the best communicators who happen to be writing things down.

They understand their audience. They know what keeps their readers up at night. They write to solve problems, not to impress people with their vocabulary.

I once worked with a financial adviser who was struggling to explain complex investment strategies to his clients. His initial approach was to write detailed technical explanations that covered every possible scenario. His clients were confused and overwhelmed.

We rewrote his communications using simple analogies and real-world examples. Instead of explaining diversification theory, he wrote about not putting all your eggs in one basket. Instead of discussing market volatility, he talked about weather patterns - sometimes sunny, sometimes stormy, but predictable over time.

His client retention rate improved by 60% in six months.

The Bottom Line

Business writing training that actually works isn't about rules and formality. It's about connection and clarity. It's about remembering that there's a real person on the other end of your email who has problems to solve and decisions to make.

Stop writing like a corporation. Start writing like a human being who happens to be really good at their job.

Your readers will thank you for it.

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Related Resources:

• Brand Local Blog - Expert insights on workplace communication
• Tag Group Posts - Professional development articles